


save me

by moondumb



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: F/F, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, angst and some fluff but mainly angst, squint for other twice ships
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-17
Updated: 2017-12-17
Packaged: 2019-02-16 01:37:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13043820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moondumb/pseuds/moondumb
Summary: Sana didn't exect that one quick call with a girl called Momo could one day turn into this complicated but heartwarming relationship.





	save me

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first fic ever lmao. i hope you guys will like it. crossposted on aff.

How much time has it been ? Two weeks? Three? About two and a half. Two and a half weeks since Sana volunteered to work at a suicide hotline. As someone who struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts before, Sana wanted to help other people with the same problems. So she did feel qualified for this job. Her caring personality also helped her during working times.

The young Japanese went to the university during the day, and worked at the hotline almost as soon as her courses ended. Juggling with her job and studies wasn't exactly the esiest thing and this gave her little free time for herself, but she was okay with it, as she always tends to put other people before her.

This day was no different from the others. She got out of the university, went to the local café next to the campus, and headed directly to the bus stop. Soon enough the said bus arrived, Sana got inside and put on her headphones, letting the music carry her away. The office wasn't too far. It took her about two songs to get there. She got off the bus, and as soon as she stepped outside, the slightly cold wind brushed across her hair. It actuall made her feel good.  It's not that she didn't like the warm temperature during summer,but after sitting in a room that was way too hot all day she didn't mind the breeze.

The small albeit welcoming office was the same as always. She greeted the six other employees before turning on the AC and settling down.

She barely got to sit down, the phone already rang.

-

After a short walk outside in the tiny park next to the office, Sana sat back down. She sighed quietly and wiped her forehead stained with beads of sweat. Her breath was shaky. Sometimes the calls really had an effect on her. To the point where she had to use all the muscles in her body to stop herself from crying. That didn't happen often, but it really impacted her.

9pm. 3 more hours to go. She can hold on.

** Ring Ring. **

She breathed in, and picked up the phone.

** Silence. **

“Hello?“ said Sana softly.

Silence, once again. The only thing that Sana could hear was someone’s heavy breathing that definitely wasn't her own.

“You can talk to me, you know. My name is Sana."

Still nothing from the other end of the line. At least for about 5 minutes. Sana sighed. This was probably a prank. She was near to hanging up. She was surprised when the other person spoke.

“Thank you, for, uh, listening."

And then they hung up.

The voice seemed to belong to a young woman. It sounded soft and a bit weak, almost childlike. This situation was quite puzzling. She's never received a call like that.

Sana hesitated to call back, but didn’t really have the time as the phone rang again.

-

9pm again. Sana’s mind wandered back to the girl who called yesterday. Would she call today? It was weird, but she hoped that yes.The unknown girl did sound like she needed help, but who was Sana to judge.

Just as the young woman was thinking about it, the phone rang.

“Hello?“

This time, she didn’t have to wait too long for an answer.

“S-sorry for hanging up like that yesterday, I didn’t want to make you worried or make you think that I’ve-- “ she paused.

It was the girl from yesterday. Sana recognized it. The voice seemed weirdly calm. And this time, the woman wasn’t crying. Sana's answer came quickly. She was kinda thankful that she called, Sana was worried about what happened to her

“Hey, don’t be sorry, you did nothing wrong. I understand that you situation might be kind of scary. You can hang up as many times as you want until you feel comfortable. I’m here to listen. "

“ Okay."

**Silence again.**  For a few minutes. But Sana couldn’t hang up. It would be contrary to her previous statement.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Sana heard the voice sigh softly.

“I’m scared.”

“And why is that?"

“I’m scared to be hurt again. I-I’ve had enough.“ The seemingly calm voice was now shaking, just like yesterday.

“Who is hurting you?" Sana rose her brow.

“A few people." The girlsaid, matter of factly.

“Do you see those people often?” _Yes, working on a solution would be the best_ , thought Sana.

“Yes. Everyday.” The girl paused again. “I can’t avoid them.“ At this point, the Japanese girl could practically hear the other holding back her tears. Even if Sana didn't know her, hearing someone in such a state tugged at her heartstrings. It also filled her with anger in some kind of way, knowing that some people are _sick_ enough to make someone feel like that.

“Do you want to talk about what they do to you or who they are? Perhaps we could think of ways to avoid them.“ Sana asked carefully.

** Silence. **

Then after a while,

“No.“

“Mmmhm. In this case, do you have a place that makes you happy? And where you don’t have to see those people, of course.“

No answer. But Sana waited as long as the other needed. Eventually, the voice would speak again. She could hear the other humming softly, thinking of a place like that.

“The dance studio.“ 

“Oh! You’re a dancer? “ _That’s so cool_ , Sana thought for a second.

The girl seemed to hesitate for a second.

“Uh, I was.“

_ Was? Did she stop dancing alltogether?  _

“I see. You should go to the dance studio then. Try to stay there as long as you can. It could help lift your mind off your current problems. Even for a little while.“

"I’ll try to.”

“Can you tell me why you stopped being a dancer?“ _Maybe she shouldn’t have asked this._ But Sana just wanted to help. Find the roots of the problem and do as much as she can to erase or at least lighten it better.

“I don’t want to tell you."

“That’s okay.“ Sana said softly. It bugged her a little, but she understood. Confessing about all your private life to a stranger wasn't exactly easy.

** Silence. Again. **

“How was your day?“ Sana decided to go freelance.

“What?“

“How was your day.” She repeated. “ If anything bad happened, it could help you to talk about it and forget it. “

The girl didn’t speak. But Sana knew she was there, she could hear her breathing through the phone.

After some time (Sana was getting used to it) an answer.

“Nothing really happened. I went to my university, but then I went home because I felt sick. The day didn’t seem as shitty as others until-“ She paused. She inhaled.

“Okay, cancel that. You don’t need to talk about it if it makes you feel bad. Okay? Instead let’s focus on the things that made you feel good today.“ Sana bit her lower lip. _Shit, she messed up._

“Well… I got to eat good food. “

“That’s cool. I hope you ate well. “

“Yeah…”

** Silence. **

** Yet again. **

“Is there anything else on your mind? “ Sana spoke up again.

“Not…really.“ The girl sighed. “Y-you actually helped me calm down a bit. Your voice is really soothing. It’s weird but I like it.“ Sana could feel the embarrassment in her tone.

Sana felt herself blush at what the other said. _What? Did she really?..._

“I’m glad I could help. And hey, there’s nothing weird about it. By the way, may I know your name? “

Sana could almost feel the other girl hesitating.

“Momo. “

“That’s a pretty name, Momo.“ Sana smiled to herself. Momo. _Peach._ That's cute. Was the other girl also Japanese? She didn't have the time to think too much about it.

“Thank you."

But before Sana could say anything, the other had already hung up. It felt bizarre, but she felt as if a big weight was lifted off her chest.

_\--_

Saturday. 5pm. Sana left her apartment to head for her job. Just as she stepped out of the elevator, her mind drifted back to that Momo girl. Something about her sparked the young woman’s interest, but she couldn't really grasp what. Perhaps she would call again toda-

_No. No. No._

She shouldn’t think about this. The very first thing they told Sana during the training is not to dwell on callers outside the job. And she was doing just that.

Maybe a stop at her favorite café would clear her thoughts.

-

So there she was, sitting in front of the phone, with her half cold and half emptied cup of coffee. It’s funny that despite how much she craved that coffee before she bought it she couldn’t finish it.

There were usually less calls on Saturday than the other days of the week. Sana only received 2 calls today, with only 3 hours on the job. And both of them were quite quick, only about 30 minutes each. Sana was good at this. She didn’t really understand why; she wasn’t trained that much and was probably the newest operator at the centre. Maybe it’s her voice? It was really beautiful, calming and pleasing to listen to indeed. Or the fact that she’s been in a similar situation as these callers, so she knew what to ask and what not to, in some situations, at least.

Ring Ring.

9pm.

Could it be?

“Hello?” Sana picked up quickly.

“Are you miss Sana?”

It was indeed Momo. She recognized the voice immediately, even if it had a different tone than yesterday.

“Uh, yes! How are you feeling Momo?”

“How do you know my name?” She sounded shocked. And she outright skipped Sana’s question. Huh.

“You told me yesterday, remember?” Sana chuckled. Could have she really forgotten?

“Oh. “ 

“Are you feeling better than yesterday?”

“I guess. I didn’t see  _them_ today.That already made the day better."

“And…are you comfortable enough to tell me who ‘ _they_ ’ are?” Sana tried again. Maybe she could get an answer.

Silence.

“What if I’m not?”

“It’s alright then, too."

Momo cleared her throat. “Anyway, I called because I went to the dance studio.”

“I see. How did it go?” Sana played with the cable. She was glad that Momo listened to her, and did actually go.

Pause. For a few moments.

“Pretty well. Actually…” She swallowed. “I didn’t feel like _dying_ at least for a few hours. “

“That’s good. Great.“ A shiver ran down her spine.  _Baby steps._  Sana reminded herself.  _Baby steps._  She couldn’t erase Momo’s depression just by talking to her once today.

“Yeah. “

Silence, as usual.

“Did you try to dance?” What the hell? Why would Sana ask this? It was a bit too…personal.

“Umm. A little. I mainly just sat there thou-“

_“MOMO HIRAI!”_

Sana perked up. That sounded like an old woman yelling far in the background. Definitely not Momo’s soft voice. So she still lived with her mother, perhaps.

“S-sana.” she sighed. “I need to talk to you but I have to go immediately. Can I call back tomorrow? Please?”

Sana’s throat suddenly felt dry. The other girl sounded so desperate; and the yells in the background got louder but were still incomprehensible for Sana. But it couldn’t go on. Momo had already called three times these last days. And what Sana was doing right now was far out of her job’s reach. She wasn’t a psychologist, she should just talk people down from suicide and make them feel better. Hell, this was an emergency line. As much as she wanted to help her, she shouldn’t keep this up and refer her to an actual psychologist.

Sana bit her lip.

“Momo…I-“

“Please.” It sounded soft. Almost like a whimper. Momo's voice was full of stress, while the yells in the background got even louder, as if the old woman was approaching.

Sana leaned back in her chair, ran her hand through her hair and sighed softly.

“Sure. Call whenever you want. I’ll be here. “

“Thank you. “ she answered softly. Sana knew what that meant. Momo would hang up soon after. _No, not yet. She hasn't finished-_ -

“Momo wai-“ but before the young japanese could say anything, Momo already hung up.

_Shit._

Should she call the police? Those shouts seemed to be pretty bad. But she couldn’t. Not without her consent. Momo could get in bigger 

Instead she decided to pray that nothing worse happened at the other end of the line.

-

Momo Hirai.

It was 11:30 and all Sana could think about is Momo Hirai. What the hell. And why? It’s not like she knew anything about her other than her name and well,  _situation_.

But she could know more if she wanted to. Knowing more could also help her find a solution for her. She really didn't want to leave her like that.

With that in mind, the young woman opened up her laptop and slowly typed the other’s name into the Naver search bar, but before she could press enter, she stopped.

_This feels wrong._

Digging into someone’s private life? Especially a caller’s? She sighed.  _Was she that desperate._ And were things on the internet really considered private, since anyone could access them?

Fuck it. Sana pressed search anyways. There is no going back now, I guess.

The first results that popped up were youtube videos.

 _Dance covers._ That matched. Momomo was a dancer after all.

She hummed, clicking on the very first result. A cover of Jun K’s “Think about you”, from a year and a half ago.

Barely 10 seconds into the video, Sana’s jaw was already on the floor. The girl was no joke, both talking about her looks and her moves. Her intimidating expression didn't match her soft voice. Sana herself danced sometimes because she really enjoyed it, but Momo? She was clearly on another level. It’s like the rhythm actually flowed through her veins while she danced.

She clicked on another video. An older one. This one was a cover of Problem.

And once again, Sana was blown away by the performance. How could a human being even move like  _that? Was it really the same Momo that she talked to a few hours ago?_

Maybe others would’ve said no way; but she knew better. People's problems weren't exactly written all over their faces.

“What are you watching?” Sana almost jumped out of her skin when she heard her roommate’s voice behind her. She slammed her laptop closed and looked back at the other girl.

“Jihyo! Stop sneaking up on me. One day I'll have a cardiac arrest if you keep doing this.“ Sana pouted.

“Jeez, I wasn’t even sneaking. You’re the one who was so immersed in whatever you were watching. What was so _special_ about it?” She rose her brows then sat down on the couch next to the Japanese girl. Sana just hoped that Jihyo didn't think that she was watching porn or something like that.

After a few minutes of silence, Sana spoke again.

“What would you do if you had a friend who really needed help but you couldn’t really help them because it’s out of your line of work?” It was sudden, and she could see the younger girl's eyes widening for a moment, taken by surprise.

“Hmm.” Jihyo looked up from her phone. “If that friend is very important and really needs help, I definitely would help them regardless.”

Sana hummed. Even if Jihyo didn't know the situation to a full extent, she could be right. “Thanks for the advice. I’m pretty tired so goodnight.” She knew that if she stayed, Jihyo would ask more, and she wasn't in the mood for that. The excuse was passable, she hoped.

Sana was right. Perhaps Jihyo could see the tiredness on the girl, so she didn't press further.

“Good night Sana.”


End file.
